Normally I don't, mostly due to the way I'm "invited" to them. They ask me if I'm coming, to which I say "probably not". Now I don't know for sure, but I'm rather positive that Miss Manners would agree that to presume the person is coming and ask if that presumption is correct is not a proper way to invite someone to something. Instead, one should just mention to them about the affair and let the ball remain in their court (either by way of an RSVP, or by if they show up or not). This is just me being persnikety, but it's a thing that rather bugs me.
But! This year (after they asked if I'd show up and I said probably not), Laura suggested that I should/could bring Ashley (my first cousin, once removed, by two marriages -- see earlier entries). Well, she didn't so much suggest that I should bring Ashley as she suggested that I should "bring that hot girl from upstairs". Since that'd actually give me someone to hang around and chat with when things grew dull, I said, "Hey! Sure! If you can get Ashley to go, I'll go. Just write up a formal invitiation since it was your fool idea". Laura wrote up said invitation, I posted it to Ashley's door. Ta da. (..oh, and they tend to plan the 'when' for these X-Mas parties about a week in advance. That's another thing that bugs me..)
A day or two passes and I've yet to run into Ashley to ask her about if she'd want to go, had other plans, etc.. Laura comes up and mentions that at the time she wasn't aware that Ashely used to work at Cristor's (IE: The Irish pub that Paul, my boss, recently opened. It's spelled "Cristor's" with a funny accent thing over the R and O, it's pronounced "Christopher's". Don't ask me why...) until she resigned due to a managerial-type guessing that she'd be fired over having "$47 in voids" on her third night learning the register (when you screw up entering something, to 'void' it is the register-version of clearing it and trying again. It's also what you do when you ring something up and then later decide to give it away for free. There's no real way to know which of those two was the backstory unless you sort through their orders and all). Because of that, it seems folks were worried that "someone" might feel uncomfortable being at the X-Mas affair with her about. So, she asked if I could disinvite Ashley.
This irks me in three ways:
1) Ashley will (and has) freely admit(ed) that she'd no clue how to use that particular register system. The voids? They were the former example of, "Whoops.. Entered the wrong thing. Let's void that and then enter the right thing". So it wasn't exacty a dishonorable discharge from Cristor's -- just a case of her realizing that she wasn't pulling it off as well as some might like and bowing out before things went south.
2) The someone "might" feel uncomfortable? So, they haven't actually been asked? I shall make a point of checking over the next few months to try to find out who the someone is, and ask them if it actually would've bugged them to have her there. I'm not going to try to sell them onto her if it would've bugged them, I don't even want to know -why- it'd bug them. I just want to know if it actually would've bugged them, and if anyone had asked them pre-party if it'd bug them. (SEE: aforementioned 'presumption' annoyance)
3) I'm pretty sure Ann Landers would also give the idea of disinvitation the hairy eyeball. Moreso if the original inviter isn't delivering the disinvite.
Alas, it seems she's out of town (not Ann Landers, but Ashley) for a few days so I haven't been able to get her take on all this. And to make matters worse, apparently she called the day before yesterday and left a message on the answering machine -- which was erased before I could hear the details. All my uncle had to say was, "something about spackle?" Hopefully, I'm not supposed to be looking after her cat. I'll stop by tomorrow and check in case that's what it was about (and hope that if it -was-, that she didn't say where she'd hidden a house key on the answering maching but instead that she'd just left her door unlocked).