..nothing! Not a single heartbeat! I'm undead!! They chased me out of the office with pitchforks and torches!
*ahem* Actually, they found nothing odd, for better or for worse. As far as an electrocardiogram can tell, my heart's healthier than they'd expect a smoker my age to be. Which unfortunately does little to explain the occasional slight left-side chest pains, occasional erratic heartbeats, occasional slight left-side tightness, occasional slight left-side shoulderblade pains, etc..
So, they set me up for blood-work on Monday afternoon to scope out cholesterol levels and blood sugar levels (might as well do both at once since both are tests that work better with pre-test fasting), and we'll see if anything comes from that. Dr.Holland's leading guess is some weird acid reflux variation that doesn't actually produce any heartburn type effects, but even that guess was with a bit of a shrug and apologetic wince.