Useless (youngwilliam) wrote,

Bagman's Gambit

So the day before yesterday, I hit up Christopher's pub and find that they got rid of their vanilla ice cream to make way for some frozen fruit puree that they'd picked up. Annoyed, I decided to pick up a thing of ice cream at the corner store before hitting Christopher's, so at least I'd have some available when I'd stop by for my Guinness float.

On the way to the store last night, some kid goes rushing around the corner (of Ohio and Hammond), wearing little save for some baggy karate-type pants and sandals. As he heads up Hammond street he still keeps cutting sharp corners...up until the wheels of the bike go off to one side on the gravel and he goes off the other way. Lying on the ground and making general pain-sounds, I consider for about five seconds and then head over to check to see if he's alright (Darn these morals and first aid training!)

I ask if he's hurt, or if it's just pain. As in, is he bleeding or does anything seem actually broken? He really doesn't answer me, even though he's now up and walking around in hunched-over circles. I ask again, and he answers: "Good" Taking that as a sign he doesn't need/want help, I start to continue to the store. He calls me back and proceeds to tell me that this is the second time this week "the bike has done that to him", and he offers to sell the bike to me for $10. I really have no use for a bike (at least, I've more use for $10) at that time, so I decline. Just to make him feel better, though, I agree that it's certainly an evil looking bike. I start to head off again, and he calls me over again. This time, it's to ask that I don't call the cops.

Ooookay. Why would I call the cops? I tell him I shan't, he repeats the deal to sell me the bike, I decline, I start to head back to the store, he repeats that he doesn't want me to call the cops.

In the store I pick up the ice cream, some Arizona Iced Tea, smokes, and some slightly nasty yogurt-like meal-in-a-bar thing. Heading back to Christopher's, I pass this kid on the sidewalk. Note, this is in the opposite side of the store (along Hammond) from where he crashed his bike. He's walking up the hill, I'm walking down the hill, he grabs the bag out of my hands with a terse, "I'm taking your beer"

The hell!?

I turn around to follow him and get about as far as one or two, "Um.. Excuse me?"s when... a bicycle cop quickly pulls over and asks the kid what's going on. Now, he (and some sketchy pal of his) and the cop are about 20' away from me, so my plan is to stand there as a near-bystander until a good time comes for me to chime in. A second bike cop pulls up and asks me and some actual random bystander what's going on. I explain to the second cop all the details, explain what's in the bag, and point out that I don't think the shirtless kid has even looked in the bag, so it he wants a little fun, he can compare my guess of what's in the bag to the kid's guess. Second cop goes over, looks in the bag, doesn't bother to ask the kid about it, hands me back my bag, and tells me it's good to go. All I can catch of the first cop and the kid is that the kid's claiming part of the story is me pushing him off his bike, but neither cop really seems to be believing it.

So! I head down to Christopher's and relate this story to the folks there (the manager and Nurse Nicky). In relating it, I realize, "Aw jeeze! The kid's now going to think that I called the cops, and he apparently hangs around that neighborhood, so.. yeah. I'll probably die tomorrow night"


Then two bike cops show up downtown a half hour later, and I recognize them as the ones up atop the hill by the store. I wave them over, we talk about it a bit, and it seems my worries were fruitless since the kid had some outstanding warrant and is apparently spending at least the next week or so in jail. Oh, and they mentioned I could probably press Theft charges, but I declined. All the better so I don't stick in his dim and drunken mind as the guy who got him arrested (when, well...I didn't, really)


MonKeys --

FreaKeys --

Skeleton Keys --

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